Thursday, August 09, 2007

time for a funeral

while i have gone on and on and whine incessently about all my trials and tribulations i know that you guys have grown tired of hearing this without me doing anything about it...soooo, with that being said the events of the last several weeks have proven to me that it is time, and perhaps someone here who has been through all this can give me some tips....i am looking for a lawyer who can be reasonably understanding yet fair......would welcome all comments on how to go about this
i realize this will cost me a lot both in finances and personal, but its time...i have no friends to loose as i have already lost them to her side.........the house, well i don't care its mortgaged for much more than its worth........... a little 1 bedroom apt would be heaven for me now just to not live the lie anymore ..........and found one the other day...very nice, private entrace...back door into a lawn area....400.00 per month......and it would be mine, my home, mine to do what i want in and decorate how i want.........i am very excited about this


publius100 said...

Go for a consult with a divorce attorney. There are in most states five issues to be determined in a divorce, whether the divorce is amicable or not: (1) whether the divorce should be allowed (no-fault makes this answer a permanent 'yes'); (2) if there are children, who's going to have custody? (3) if there are children, who's going to pay child support, and how much; (4) does either spouse need alimony (in most states these days, alimony is no longer gender-based); and (5) division of property--real estate, personal property, debts.
Once you have this roadmap, you'll feel a little better about things.

One Half said...

I went through something similar a few years ago after 16 years of marriage and with three kids, if you want to email me, we can chat.

P.S. I'm going to put a link to your blog on my blog.

Lewis said...

You need to's not going to be easy. Depends on the laws inyour state. She'll have access to many of your finances...401K, pension, savings, equity in the house, etc. If you're going to move out and leave here there, you'll have to come up with the $$$ to buy her out. It's not going to be easy. But getting started is the key.

manxxman said...'ve been gone (from blogging for far too long). Don't worry about have a right. It's damn hard striking out on your own again.

The possible "new" place sound good to me. Make sure you speak with an attorny before you move need to find out if the courts could rule that you "abandoned" the family.

Deep breaths and lots of more blogs. We are all here for you.

Akoni S. Chaput said...

I found your blog through scotty, and just wanted to say 'keep your head up', it'll get better with time....just might be too fresh at the moment. Have a place of your own and doing as you please will be a very empowering feeling. Good luck with life and try to keep the smile, it helps.

Lacey said...

Lots and lots and lots of gay men started out married and have gone thru it. You'll make it. You are not alone, even though you feel like you are.

Stephen said...

Sounds like a consult with the lawyer is the general consenus. At least, then you will know what steps need to be taken. Always remember your friends are here for you.